YEAR 2035
Me: Kids, I am
gonna tell you all an incredible story. The story of how uncle Ronny met aunt Jenny
Kids(confused)
: Dad! Thought you gonna tell us about how u met mom.
Me: well, kids
the story of how i met your mom includes some complications and things which i
will reconsider, analyse and edit and tell, so...its gonna take me a while. In
the meantime i will tell you all this incredible story of the two people who
are really close to my heart, and well yours too..
Son(innocent
and childish excitement): yeah..!! it’s always nice to hear stories about uncle
ronny.
Daughter(with
equally innocent excited voice): and aunt Jenny!!!
Me:25 years ago
sitting in our regular booth at tina’s juice centre near our college PCCE, your
uncle ronny admitted to a “gospel” which was gonna haunt him for the next 2
years.
He said “ i
think i may have developed a little crush on that girl”.
At that time,
We were in the third semester , and pretty much fresh and raring to enjoy our
next 3 years in college, so when i first heard it from his mouth, my reaction
was.. well lets just say i ended up puking the orange juice which i was drinking
in my own mouth and gulping it down my throat
Son: gross!!
Dad you are so disgusting
Me: now, stop
talking in between, do you wanna listen
to the story or no?
Son: I think I better go and play fifa
Daughter: I
will go and watch vampire diaries season 20
Me: no no!!,
kids listen to me, will handle Q&A’s later
Ok so where was i?
Ah yes
I clearly
remember that particular day. We had practical’s and me and ronny reached
late..and ronny couldn’t get a place to sit next to aunt Jenny. The master
coder ronny couldn’t even solve a simple C++ code that day, he had no interest
in reading player ratings of arsenals 4-4 draw against Liverpool. I could see
it on his face, I could sense it, the kind of feelings he had developed. No
offense my dear daughter but girls are complicated and it was initial stage so
I couldn’t risk giving a stern advice over this to ronny. It would have been
vaguely premature from my side.
So, as the
days went on their friendship grew stronger n somewhere between the 3rd sem, he
fell in love with her. But the things between them were just based on those
four magical words “we are just friends”, atleast for the external world around
them.
And then came
the 4th semester. One fine day we sitting at the willy’s ice cream parlour eating
our favourite ice-cream promoted by then England football team captain john
terry, and uncle ronny told me a secret which he had kept to himself for a long
time.
Son: dad, can
i ask you a question, isn’t willy’s the place where you get cigarettes and
stuff?
Me: son, those
were good old days back then, we weren’t even knowing the spelling of cigarette
let alone touching or smoking it, listen, I am gonna tell you an important
thing “smoking kills” and..
Son(interrupting):
dad I am fifteen for god sake I know smoking is harmful.
Me:
ok...good..
So, uncle
ronny told me that he indeed confessed about his feelings to aunt Jenny, and
she told him that she too “had” developed
feelings for him but presently
her feelings magically ( or rather “tragically” for uncle ronny) disappeared
and she doesn’t feel it anymore, uncle ronny had gone for a long tour to
Kolkata, and he confessed to me that had he known earlier, he would have come
back to goa any day in between that tour, such a romantic guy your uncle ronny
was/is..
What followed
The following semester was the series of
”THE END” and “the end of THE END”. Where in both used to stop talking
to each other, start talking to each other, listen to sad songs, sing happy songs together, stop sitting with each
other, walk with each other. We friends
could only believe and hear those
magical words again “we are just friends”. But your uncle ronny has always been
truthful to me. He used to tell me everything. And He always continued and
tried his best to be with her and accepted whatever “the end” or “the ban” she
used to impose on her. Aunt Jenny has always been a nice person but as you all
know girls take a lot of time to accept some stern reality and she took her own
sweet time, but what made me proud and what made aunt jenny proud is the fact
that despite so many “failures”, “accidents”,
“no-feelings”, “backs” and everything wrong that happened during those
times, uncle ronny always kept pushing, he always kept believing in himself and
in his true love.
He sang “I can
be your hero”, he went on to search and got the best shwarma in goa for her,
There was this
one instance where uncle ronny reaches home which is 60 kms far from college, and he gets a text from aunt
Jenny saying “wish you were here in college”. He, without thinking twice,
drives all the way back to the college and surprises her.
There were
times when he used to feel depressed and call me in babaji’s cold drink house,
we used to sit there in our regular booth and discuss about “the end” for
hours. I always believed that what they had/have is special. Because, I had
seen them together in my dreams. Kids I
have this weird theory, whatever I see in my dreams, it always turns out to be
true.
Son: did you
see mom in your dreams too?
Me: well, when
I met your mom, I went into the longest dream of my life, and I never came out
of it, I am still relishing that dream..
So, getting
back to uncle ronny, those times he handled it pretty strongly, honestly if I
was at his place, I would given up a long time ago...but as I said what they
had was/is something special. And universe kept on conspiring and derailing
their “the end” train. Although the things remained the same “we are just
friends”, “no feelings”!!!
But then came
the amiable twist,
on the lonely, darkest and scary night of 27th
march 2011, uncle ronny received a weirdest text, some kind of a code, he first
thought it was from the aliens. But soon he checked it was from aunt Jenny, he
couldn’t believe his eyes.
He casually
picked his phone and called me. I will recite you all the exact conversation
Ronny: hey
bro, what u doing?
Me: well, me
chatting with this girl “what’s her name” (sorry kids i don’t remember her name
anymore).. and I just “vazied” her.
Ronny: OMG,
don’t tell me you used “the vazy” trick, did it work??
Me: oh yes,
the “the vazy “always works,
anyways what’s up? What’s so important to call in the middle of the night?
Ronny: bro u
wont believe what just happened? I don’t know how to tell you, Jenny texted me
some code, some weird code.
Me: article
322 of brocode says that when a bro stumbles upon a mysterious code or any
mysterious design by da-vinci , he should always work in co-operation with a
fellow bro while decoding it. See you tomorrow morning at babaji’s and don’t come in shorts like
always , “jeans –up”.
The next
morning he showed me the text containing that code. It was a cryptographic
recite. Let me tell you all one thing about aunt jenny. She might come across
as a lazy person but she is one of the brightest minds around, in college she
always used to mysteriously clear all the difficult, brainy papers but used to
screw up all her easy papers cause of her laziness.
Getting back
to the code, we worked on decrypting that code for 2 days, I tried all my brute
force algorithms, uncle ronny apparently used to stare at the code on his cell
for hours, although i still feel he
ended up staring at aunt Jenny’s picture instead like how he always used to
do.
And after all
this effort and tireless working day and night, cramming our brain with
numerous possibilities we concluded that
WE ARE GOOD
FOR NOTHING
Kids: so dad
what was that code, how did you all find out?
Son: well kids
respecting your aunt’s high level of intelligence, we invoked the “bro-oath”
and decided to keep the anonymity of that code a secret, but I will tell you
all what it contained.
4 days later
on 31st march 2011 aunt eventually disclosed the hidden meaning behind that
code; it contained those 3 magical words “i love you”.
She accepted
the feelings are mutual, apparently she told him “I hate you for never letting
me go, I hate you for always being there for me, I hate you I hate you I hate
you, but I love you”
Uncle ronny
was the happiest person that day.. And well needless to say i was equally happy
for them and well i have nothing else to say what happened for years to follow,
as they say in movies.. They went on to live happily ever after...:)
Kids blame the
movies for having such high expectations of relationship, but honestly i
believe whatever relationship it is, whether friendship, love or even parental.
In a long run The only thing that holds it together or required for its
sustainability is TRUTH and TRUST.
So, kids its
almost 12.30, its time to witness the epic champions league final between
Liverpool and AC Milan. Finish your dinner quickly..lets cheer our lovely club,
and after the match I am gonna tell you all how Liverpool won the 2005
champions league.
Kids(shouting):
dad...!!! How boring can u be?
Me: A lot..;)
